Alas Smith and Jones

Author menaced by frogman / Opening titles / Celebrities in ancient Rome / Tat auction with one bidder / Male rape victim / Millwall FC supporters transfer / TeleMexico (Korean and Bulgarian team names) / Head to head - holidays / Fast Lane Loony (song) / Swimming pool poseurs / Charity appeal - Wormigro (World Organization for Middle Income Groups) / Male pregnancy / Head to head - Club 18-30 holidays / Cryptic spies / "I can remember when this was all fields" / Job losses and gains / Medical Watch - venereal disease / Just Buried / End Credits / Message for parents of new born babies